As I get older and older ……. And older …… It allows you an opportunity to reflect on a lot of things. One of the things I have been blessed with and there have been a lot …… is the quality of kids that parents have allowed into MY life. To be able to watch so many of them turn into such positive and useful parts of society is amazin’ …. I owe them such a debt of gratitude. They affected me far more than what I could have ever done for their children. There are so many of you that i could never ever tell you all. and for those parents that have watch from above – thank you for guiding the steps of us all. Thanks from the bottom of my heart even though most of you will never read this on Facebook.
For that couple who always tells me, “We want to give you your roses while you’re living”. Thank you for allowing me in some small way reinforce what you two instilled in her.
For the parents who told me their child would never have graduated if not for me ….. Thank you but it was you who instilled those things within that baby. I just tried to help reinforce your teachings. The conversation we had when your daughter was slipping away and you wanted to know what was going on with her. I really was not going to respond to your question but it turned into a plea, when you said,”Coach, you have daughters, wouldn’t you want to know about your own? Wouldn’t you want someone to tell you so you could save them?” ….. Talk about a parent that knew how to grab you where it hurts. Sooooo, we had a long conversation ….. Thanks for trusting me enough to know I would only tell you the truth. That mother was in Tallahassee before the sun came down and that young lady made an incredible turn around. She did graduate!
To my student who taught me the power of believing. You said I never gave up on you ….YOU Never gave up on yourself! This student flunked out of school so many times – it had to be a national record but somehow he would get back in. I stopped telling him, “son you will not get back in school! It is impossible!” Holding his head up high, “he would say, OK, Mr. Clayton we’ll see.” I would see him in two weeks and he would have his classes and be in school. He needed to conducts a seminar on ‘How to get back in School after always flunking out” – I’m serious. I remember standing in front of Gaither Gym one day, going off on him because he promised me something he was supposed to do for a class he was in and he hadn’t done it. Mind you it wasn’t my class but he was still supposed to do it and he promised me he would. Anyway, an administrator walks by, interrupts and asks the student, “are you ok? You don’t have to take that from him.” The student respectfully let the Administrator finish and then without ever raising his voice said, “Mr.. Clayton is like my daddy. He is the only person who believes in me, the only person who helps me. He can talk to me anyway he wants to.” He then turned his back to the Administrator, faced me and I continued on ……. Long story short …. He did graduate. It took forever but he did graduate and is holding down a good job. This young man taught me the power of perserverance.
For the students who I have had from Upward Bound to have worked for me in the Booster Office – thank you! It has been great to see you grow up and to live your dreams …..it has really been a blessing to have been a part. Thank you for keeping me a part of the journey by the visits, emails, pictures, calls and life updates. You can’t begin to imagine what it is like to know you have remembered something we talked about and share it with others. The times we have talked about the adverse life situations you faced and that you often times faced them to prepare you with ‘life preparations’. Life preparations that would assist you when your friends, children and grands would go through them and you would have your own ‘life experiences’ to pull them through.
To the student who walked in my office long ago and said, “Thanks Coach for being you.” I looked at him confused. He continued, “it’s because of you I continue on in life because I look at the negativity around you and you never let it faze you, you always treat me the same.”
I have reflected on those words many times. Son, you gave me far more than I could ever give you.
To one of my basketball players who told me not long ago, “they can say whatever they want about Mickey Clayton but all of his guys grew up to be successful and able to handle their business. We didn’t have a sense of entitlement and he made us learn how to be man at a time when society didn’t want us to be.” I never had sons but I have a lot of sons.
To my Rattlerettes who talked about the day they would graduate and come back to my house, eat up all my barbq and tell me all the things they used to do that I didn’t know about ……. I’m still waiting. LOL
Thanks for introducing me to your grown up babies. What a blessing! Then in one case to be able to coach mother and then …… Daughter.
Or the time I was sitting at a stop light and this guy pulls up in a car so raggedy that it looked like it was turning but it was going straight. It was hot and for some reason my windows were down. I guess because I could not have heard the message he soon delivered. Anyway, I looked across the passenger seat at him and we spoke at to each other – but then he said – “Hey Coach, you are going to be alright ……….. because you are in God’s hands.” He turned the corner using both hands straining to turn the wheel with all of his might and sputtered down the street. The light turned green and I was just sitting there with my mouth open feeling the personal message that had been delivered to me when it needed to be, even though I wasn’t aware it was needed.
Every seed that is planted doesn’t bear the fruit we hope for …….
Every word is not always heard …….
But the message had to be delivered
Sometimes more than once
There are many that just left or disappeared, Often times I wondered what happened to some …… To many It is even harder to bury some of them …. To speak at the funerals.
Those too are lessons learned.
They balance out the graduation announcements, wedding announcements, birth of their child announcements ………. Life does balance out many things.
To my friends. Thanks for being there through it all from Florida to Newport, Rhode Island to Cleveland to Merritt Island & Cocoa, Florida ……to The tallest of the 7 Hills in Tallahassee and FAMU. Even when my circle got smaller as I had my daughters. That was a conscious effort to protect them. I never felt it was too good to have too many people in and out of your house with girls. Always err on the side of caution with your children … Always.
What did my daughter say when there was an issue at school? There was a problem and they wouldn’t let her get to the telephone to call her daddy and tell him. They said, “if you call your daddy there will be a problem.” My daughter said, “problem? When my daddy gets here, he’s gonna handle the problem.” You got that right baby! I bought them a cell phone the next day so we would never have them where they couldn’t contact me for a problem.
To my Angels that have watched over me when chaos was all around. To God for blessing me with a discerning eye. Who answered my personal prayer to ……”show me the people who mean me no good. To continue to bless them but to just show them to me so I will know to be vigilant in their presence.”
To my FAMU students, Upward Bound students, academic students, Rattlerette players, Rattlers, Comets, and all the rest ….. Thank you and know that … I LOVE all of you.
Thank you for sharing this day with me!
Mickey Clayton Etchings 